What Are You (Not) Saying?
We’re all salespeople! We have to motivate, influence and persuade others in order to achieve things together. It gets even more complicated if there are multiple parties involved so we need to be really considered when delivering feedback.
Sometimes we receive feedback, sometimes not. It’s amazing the effect it can have on us both as sender of the message and recipient. I’ve devised a game: The Bendy Man Feedback Game which allows people to instantly understand the impact these 4 kinds of feedback have:
Negative Feedback: – not helpful or constructive, can be personal, even insulting: for example “that’s not what we discussed, why would you want to do that?” or “Hmmm, Jo would have been able to make those arrangements without this kind of hassle…” or “I didn’t call back because I didn’t have anything to update you on…”
Impact of negative feedback:
Conflict, reduced morale, destroys trust.
No Feedback: Stone cold silence! Examples might be not letting customers know the situation or not setting time frames with them or even just leaving them on hold too long! Or putting someone in a new role or giving additional responsibilities without fully discussing expectations.
Impact of no feedback:
Stress, frustration, doubt, reduces confidence in relationship.
Positive Feedback: at first feels good and soon loses its initial value. Example “You’ll be great, you don’t need my help, no don’t worry about that it’ll be fine” (Empty praise and no direction!)
Impact of positive feedback:
Good at first, quickly shifting to realisation that it lacks credibility and sincerity, leads to frustration.
Constructive Feedback: Helpful and delivered with goals/ outcomes/ objectives in mind, can be challenging and focussed on development. Here’s a team based example: “I just heard what you were saying to that customer, you did really well and I’d like to help you prepare for when you call them back, shall we go through some ideas together?”
Impact of constructive feedback:
Allows parties to move to achieving mutual goals, develops better understanding of each other’s motives, brings clarity, defined actions, helps to set time frames and expectations- gets things done!
So if you have any current challenges that require someone else responding or taking action, consider how compelled they are by the last piece of feedback you discussed.
Here’s a video of “The Bendy Man Feedback Game” I hope you enjoy it. Feel free to leave feedback!